'Well that was a boring war!'
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- Jasonrocks
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'Well that was a boring war!'
I'm making a new film, a comedy about ww1. Its about life in the trench. The cast include Captain George. A man who cares about only himself. Derek a lowly private and finally a medic who si a bit 'poofy' and goes by the name of ......medic.
The film will be a while yet so here are some oof the quotes from the film Enjoy.
(DEREK IS TAKING ABOUT HOW GEORGE LOOKS LIKE MEDIC.)
GEORGE: Me and medic look as simaler as a elephant and a flea.
DEREK: But you do.
GEORGE: And you look like the contents of my hanky after I've wiped my nose but yet I dont sqwak about it all day.
(GEORGE AND DEREK ARE IN AN EMPTY TRENCH)
DEREK: The trench is empty.
GEORGE: A lot like your head.
(THE GANG ARE TAKING ABOUT HWO TO TELL IF SOMEBODY IS A GERMAN SPY)
DEREK: I know, ask them there name. And if they have 'von' in there name. There german.
MEDIC: What if they dont have 'von' in there name?
DEREK: Ask them if they like sausages.
( MEDIC ENETRS THE TRENCH.)
MEDIC: Sorry I'm late, mon cap-e-tan!
GEORGE: I'm sorry your here.
The film will be a while yet so here are some oof the quotes from the film Enjoy.
(DEREK IS TAKING ABOUT HOW GEORGE LOOKS LIKE MEDIC.)
GEORGE: Me and medic look as simaler as a elephant and a flea.
DEREK: But you do.
GEORGE: And you look like the contents of my hanky after I've wiped my nose but yet I dont sqwak about it all day.
(GEORGE AND DEREK ARE IN AN EMPTY TRENCH)
DEREK: The trench is empty.
GEORGE: A lot like your head.
(THE GANG ARE TAKING ABOUT HWO TO TELL IF SOMEBODY IS A GERMAN SPY)
DEREK: I know, ask them there name. And if they have 'von' in there name. There german.
MEDIC: What if they dont have 'von' in there name?
DEREK: Ask them if they like sausages.
( MEDIC ENETRS THE TRENCH.)
MEDIC: Sorry I'm late, mon cap-e-tan!
GEORGE: I'm sorry your here.
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RE:
I like it, nay, I love it! Lets see a full script, this looks like a very promising project.
Losing consciousness,
in the arms of an angel,
I find only peace.
in the arms of an angel,
I find only peace.
- Jasonrocks
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- Joined: Tue Apr 05, 2005 5:41 pm
- Location: Wakefield, England
RE:
OK I'lle give you a scene from the film where the gang are trying to overcome bordem. Not going to give the whole script away go early.
( THE GANG ARE IN THE TRENCH.)
MEDIC: Are you bored, captain?
GEORGE: Well lets say if boredom was an olympic sport. I'd be a multi gold medalist, a hall of fame inducte and have my own line of cheap tastless cereals.
MEDIC: Oh well dont worry. The wars almost over, alll the papers are saying it is.
GEORGE: No george. MY retarted friend. That is propaganda. Look at it, its pure bull, its as beliveable as guy fawke's defence lawyer.
MEDIC: But the war may nearly be over, we will destroy berlin and give mr. kaiser bill a good wolap. Old british stick of meat. A true bulldog we brits are.
GEORGE: Medic. Has your brain broke again?
(DEREK ENTERS.)
DEREK: Hello cap'an, hello medic. Cap I got a note for you from HQ.
(GEORGE READS THE LETTER.)
MEDIC: Whos it from?
GEORGE: If you must know, it was kaiser bill wanting me to have tea and cookies abord his battle ship 'big bertha' and then take a stroll through no mans land.
DEREK:Really?
GEORGE: No. HQ. Probally another chance to get filled with bullets by germans. I wount be long. You two will get on fine. No brain and slow brain will go together like glue and paper.
END OF SCENE
( THE GANG ARE IN THE TRENCH.)
MEDIC: Are you bored, captain?
GEORGE: Well lets say if boredom was an olympic sport. I'd be a multi gold medalist, a hall of fame inducte and have my own line of cheap tastless cereals.
MEDIC: Oh well dont worry. The wars almost over, alll the papers are saying it is.
GEORGE: No george. MY retarted friend. That is propaganda. Look at it, its pure bull, its as beliveable as guy fawke's defence lawyer.
MEDIC: But the war may nearly be over, we will destroy berlin and give mr. kaiser bill a good wolap. Old british stick of meat. A true bulldog we brits are.
GEORGE: Medic. Has your brain broke again?
(DEREK ENTERS.)
DEREK: Hello cap'an, hello medic. Cap I got a note for you from HQ.
(GEORGE READS THE LETTER.)
MEDIC: Whos it from?
GEORGE: If you must know, it was kaiser bill wanting me to have tea and cookies abord his battle ship 'big bertha' and then take a stroll through no mans land.
DEREK:Really?
GEORGE: No. HQ. Probally another chance to get filled with bullets by germans. I wount be long. You two will get on fine. No brain and slow brain will go together like glue and paper.
END OF SCENE
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RE:
With the right deadpan delivery, and some effort in the setting and costumes, this will be fantastic.
Losing consciousness,
in the arms of an angel,
I find only peace.
in the arms of an angel,
I find only peace.
RE:
Its pretty funny! Is there going to be a lot of gore?
"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom."
-Isaiah 40:28
-Isaiah 40:28
- Jasonrocks
- Senior Member
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- Joined: Tue Apr 05, 2005 5:41 pm
- Location: Wakefield, England
RE:
not much gore it in really. More of a comedy, not saving private ryan.
Visits? That would indicate visitors!
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Re: RE:
Yeah.. has never been done before. *cough* Dads Army *cough* MASH *cough* and the other hundred that are out there.Almondo99 wrote:Good idea blending comedy and war! The script is very well though out.
Never the less, give it a go. Hope to see the final product.
RE: Re: RE:
Cough*blackadder goes forth*cough
Ive gotta say, it does sound alot like BGF in places..... but hey, itus good.
Pull it off.... and I would watch it and laugh
Good comedy (like funny laughing at the jokes, ect.) is one of the hardest amatuer film subjects... that and love. Good luck
Ive gotta say, it does sound alot like BGF in places..... but hey, itus good.
Pull it off.... and I would watch it and laugh
Good comedy (like funny laughing at the jokes, ect.) is one of the hardest amatuer film subjects... that and love. Good luck
- Jasonrocks
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- Location: Wakefield, England
RE: Re: RE:
I've not seen blackadder goes fourth just blackadder 2.
Visits? That would indicate visitors!
RE: Re: RE:
I'd make it a more serious type of movie People would like it more. It does sound funny thogh
Scott Haight
Chewie Films
Chewie Films
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RE: Re: RE:
Before going any further I would watch Blackadder goes forth. Your Captain has the same personality as Blackadder. But, the Blackadder seasons were never long enough, so I would enjoy something on those lines.
Blackadder III, Duel and Duality
Blackadder : An unwise action, Baldrick, since Mad McAdder is a homicidal maniac.
Baldrick : My mother told me to stand up to homicidal maniacs.
Blackadder : Yes. If this is the same mother who confidently claimed that you were a tall handsome stallion of a man, I should treat her opinions with extreme caution.
Baldrick : I love my mum.
Blackadder : And I love chops and sauce but I don't seek their advice.
***
Prince George : No wait Blackadder. Perhaps this disgusting degraded creature is some sort of blessing in disguise.
Blackadder : Well if he is it's a very good disguise.
Prince George : After all did not our Lord send a lowly earthworm to comfort Moses in his torment?
Blackadder : No.
Prince George : Well it's the sort of thing he might have done.
***
"Baldrick, your brain is like the four headed, man-eating haddock fish beast of Aberdeen"
"In what way? "
"It doesn't exist "
***
Captain Darling: I'm as British as Queen Victoria!
Blackadder: So your father's German, you're half German and you married a German?
***
Blackadder: Right Baldrick, let's try again. This is called adding. If I have two beans and then I add two more beans, what do I have?
Baldrick: Some beans.
Blackadder: Yes...and no. Let's try again, shall we? I have two beans, then I add to more beans what does that make?
Baldrick: A very small casserole.
Blackadder: Baldrick, the ape creature of the Indus have mastered this. Now, try again. One, two, three, four! So how many are there?
Baldrick: Three
Blackadder: What.
Baldrick: (Pointing to one) And that one.
Blackadder: (Picking it up) Three and that one. So if I add that one to the three what will I have?
Baldrick: Ah! Some beans.
Blackadder: Yes. To you Baldrick, the rennaissance was just something that happened to other people, wasn't it?
Blackadder III, Duel and Duality
Blackadder : An unwise action, Baldrick, since Mad McAdder is a homicidal maniac.
Baldrick : My mother told me to stand up to homicidal maniacs.
Blackadder : Yes. If this is the same mother who confidently claimed that you were a tall handsome stallion of a man, I should treat her opinions with extreme caution.
Baldrick : I love my mum.
Blackadder : And I love chops and sauce but I don't seek their advice.
***
Prince George : No wait Blackadder. Perhaps this disgusting degraded creature is some sort of blessing in disguise.
Blackadder : Well if he is it's a very good disguise.
Prince George : After all did not our Lord send a lowly earthworm to comfort Moses in his torment?
Blackadder : No.
Prince George : Well it's the sort of thing he might have done.
***
"Baldrick, your brain is like the four headed, man-eating haddock fish beast of Aberdeen"
"In what way? "
"It doesn't exist "
***
Captain Darling: I'm as British as Queen Victoria!
Blackadder: So your father's German, you're half German and you married a German?
***
Blackadder: Right Baldrick, let's try again. This is called adding. If I have two beans and then I add two more beans, what do I have?
Baldrick: Some beans.
Blackadder: Yes...and no. Let's try again, shall we? I have two beans, then I add to more beans what does that make?
Baldrick: A very small casserole.
Blackadder: Baldrick, the ape creature of the Indus have mastered this. Now, try again. One, two, three, four! So how many are there?
Baldrick: Three
Blackadder: What.
Baldrick: (Pointing to one) And that one.
Blackadder: (Picking it up) Three and that one. So if I add that one to the three what will I have?
Baldrick: Ah! Some beans.
Blackadder: Yes. To you Baldrick, the rennaissance was just something that happened to other people, wasn't it?
O. M. G.
Orkney Movie Group
www.orkneymoviegroup.co.uk
Orkney Movie Group
www.orkneymoviegroup.co.uk
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RE: Re: RE:
O. M. G.
Orkney Movie Group
www.orkneymoviegroup.co.uk
Orkney Movie Group
www.orkneymoviegroup.co.uk