Script for my next movie

[nileo6]

I'm planning on making a horror flick for my next movie I still don't have the entire storyline planned through yet but here is Scene 1. Let me know what you think if you have a few minutes to spare. or you could rate my script.


FADE IN:

EXT. DRIVEWAY

The rain pounds loudly on the empty concrete driveway. A quick
flash of light and the crackling boom of the thunder sounds
through the air as the front wheel of a car pulls into the
driveway and stops in the center of the shot.

As the rumbling of the engine dies another flash illuminates the
wet concrete and the newly arrived vehicle synchronized by a
second roar of thunder.

Cut a wide angle shot a few feet behind the back of the car.

The car door swings open and a young man climbs out uselessly
trying to shield himself from the rain. (The audience will not
see the man because his back is facing the camera). He quickly
slams the door shut and continues on.

XCU of his feet moving quickly along the drenched sidewalk toward
the front door of a small house until they reach the rugged
welcome mat laying crookedly on the front porch.

CU of his left hand knocking loudly on the cracked paint of front
door.

MS from the back of the man. A few seconds pass and still no one
seems to be home. As he waits on the shielded porch, he looks
around. Up then to his side, to the ground, then he moves his
head back up again.

CU of his left hand knocking on the door for the second time. But
this time he doesn't wait long. Knows that no one is there.

CU of the back of his head. He casually turns around and the
audience receives their first look of the main character. A
faint, white blur from inside passes by the glass panes of the
door as he turns to face the camera. He becomes suddenly puzzled
by something.

Camera Pans left until it reaches his car with the passenger's
door shaking freely in the wind. Another bright flash of
lightning illuminates the scenery, followed by the continued
sound of the rain and an extremely loud crackle of thunder.

Camera follows man as he runs back to the car and shuts the door
without thinking to check inside.

When he runs back to the front porch he doesn't stop to knock.
The man gently jiggles the knob and the door lurches open. The
title of the movie flashes onto the screen as he steps into the
house.

[nileo6]

Anybody?

[pan-modo_pictures]

It's good, sounds like it will be good. The only thing I don't like is how the title will just flash up. I would start with some credits first after he gets in

[nileo6]

Ya thats true. but I'm gonna wait until later to work through the intro credits and such. I hope its not to boring because the first part has no dialoge

[Epsilon]

Here is a big time scriptwriting fact:

Directors HATE it when the writer tells them how to shoot the movie by putting in camera angles and notes! If you plan to sell it, refrain from directing the camera unless it is an ultimate necessity. But if it is just for your own self, then write whatever the heck you want in!

Looks good so far, keep it up.

[lukeprausnitz]

do the credits, and you could be home free

[nileo6]

Hey thanks that'll be good to know when I write scripts for other people. But as for now I planned out everything exactly so I could get it done fast if I end up shooting it in the rain. Does anyone know how I could do rain and not with it being cg.

[levertuning]

It's looks good. I'm curious how the story will continue!