I haven't posted anything on here for a while. I started a new script this morning. I thought I would post the first ten pages. See what you guys think.
I'll be honest. I have no real idea where this script is going. I'm just gonna post pages as I write them.
If anyone is interested and wants to read as I go it would be great to hear some feedback. What's working for ya and what isnt kind of thing.
Anyway. Here's the first ten.
Code: Select all
OVER BLACK
Clicking sounds as a spring powered device is wound up.
The clicking stops and a gentle music box type tune starts
to play.
CLOSE ON: ROTATING FIGURINE
Hand made from different bits and pieces. Copper wire,
springs, cogs, small pieces of scrap metal.
Despite it's raw materials, it manages to project an
elegant beauty as it "dances" in warm amber light of a --
EXT. CITY BACK STREET - NIGHT
-- City street light. One of many, it casts amber light
across an empty street of small shop fronts and down into
the low window of a --
INT. BASEMENT WORKSHOP - SAME
Situated below the shop above. It's completely dark except
for the street light.
The figurine sits on a workbench full of small hand tools
and pieces of old mechanical devices.
On the wall behind the bench, hangs several old clocks.
A shadow moves. The room is not as empty as we may first
have thought.
The dancing figurine starts to slow down. The music that
plays along with it also slows.
A dark figure steps forward, takes the figurine and leaves
the room. The door swings shut slowly behind it.
We hear heavy footsteps on stairs, footsteps above us,
another door opens and a bell rings.
Then silence.
Someone walks past the basement window outside up on the
street.
TIME CUT TO --
INT. BASEMENT WORKSHOP - MORNING
Still on the basement window, bright shafts of morning
sunlight illuminate the room.
A new set of feet walk past the window.
EXT. CITY BACK STREET - SAME
The feet belong to FREDRICK BAKER late 50's. He carries a
bag in one hand and a folded newspaper in the other,
reading as he walks.
He reaches the front door of a shop, takes a set of keys
from his pocket and lets himself in.
The sign on the shop window reads --
FREDRICK BAKERS ANTIQUITIES - BUY, SELL, TRADE AND REPAIR
INT. BAKERS ANTIQUITIES - CONTINUOUS
Fredrick puts the bag down, turns and then stops. He looks
down to the floor.
MUDDY FOOTPRINTS lead across the room and to a nearby door
that's marked WORKSHOP.
He shakes his head.
FREDRICK
Tut tut tut. Not again.
He walks away from the footprints and into the --
BACK ROOM
He puts the kettle on, looks at his newspaper and picks up
the phone. Dials and waits.
FREDRICK
(into phone)
Hello Micky. Fredrick here. I
would like to place a...
(beat)
Oh but.. I know I.. Look I know
what I owe you... I'm just in a
little bit of a hole at the
moment. But I will be straight
again by the end of the month.
It's been a little slow that's
all...
(beat)
Well OK.
(smiles and looks back
to the paper)
Two hundred on the 11:15 at
Doncaster... "HEAVENS FATE". Yes.
That's all. Thank you.
He puts the phone down, smiles. The smile fades, he walks
over to a broom cupboard.
EXT. BAKERS ANTIQUITIES
A young women walks past Bakers and heads down the street.
In her mid 20's, pretty with a determined face. Her name is
SOPHIE.
EXT. STREET
She crosses the road and chats for a moment to a local
postman. She takes some mail and goes to the front door of
a nearby CAFE/COFFEE SHOP.
The sign above the window reads --
SOPHIE'S PLACE
She stops and looks down at her feet. A small figurine has
been placed at the base of the door. She looks at it.
Shakes her head, picks it up and goes inside.
INT. SOPHIE'S PLACE - CONTINUOUS
Sophie's place is a small rustic looking coffee shop. About
seven small tables and a shop counter at the end of the
room.
She comes inside and sets up for the day.
-- Fills coffee machine with coffee, turns them on.
-- Tops up sugar pots.
-- Switches on fridge lights, fresh pastries and cakes look
out from within.
Finally she puts some small change into the till. Hits a
button and it rings. She smiles, ready for the day.
INT. BAKERS ANTIQUITIES - FRONT OF SHOP
Fredrick uses a mop and bucket and finishes up cleaning the
muddy footprints.
Finished, he puts the mop down and heads over to the
WORKSHOP door.
INT. BASEMENT WORKSHOP
Fredrick stomps down the steps leading to the main workshop
area. The same room we saw before. He spots a clock that
hangs on the wall, walks over to it, inspecting it. It
works perfectly .
He turns and heads to a door at he rear of the workshop.
Knocks hard.
FREDRICK
Edward! EDWARD!!!
Muffled groaning comes from within.
FREDRICK
Edward!! Are you awake in there?
We must speak immediately.
More muffled groaning now followed by some sounds of
movement.
FREDRICK
Edward you were out last night. I
know you were. I thought we had
an agreement Edward? I kept my
side of the bargain. I expected
you to keep yours...
Above him a bell rings. Someone's entered the shop.
FREDRICK
We'll talk about this later
Edward.
Fredrick turns and heads upstairs.
CLOSE ON: DOOR HANDLE as it begins to turn.
INT. BAKERS ANTIQUITIES - FRONT OF SHOP
Fredrick comes up from the basement to find SOPHIE stood in
the shop. She carries a cup of coffee and looks around. She
spots Fredrick, smiles.
SOPHIE
Oh.. Hello. My name is Sophie, I
erm.. I opened a few weeks back.
Sophie's Place?
Fredrick nods recognition.
FREDRICK
Fredrick Baker.
He reaches out to shake hands. She changes the hand that
holds the coffee. Shakes.
SOPHIE
Well I've been gradually trying
to introduce myself to the
"neighbors" so to speak. Here.
Holds of cup of coffee.
SOPHIE
I brought you this. Hope you like
coffee.
She hands it over, he takes the coffee.
FREDRICK
Well.. Thank you.
SOPHIE
I wasn't sure how you liked it.
She fumbles in her pockets, pulls out a few small packets
of sugar and a small plastic tub of milk.
SOPHIE
I always come prepared.
FREDRICK
(holding up his hand)
Oh no. Black's fine. Really.
P.O.V - SOMETHING BEHIND DOOR
Through a crack in the door someone watches Sophie and
Fredrick talk.
BACK TO SCENE
SOPHIE
So how long have you been here?
FREDRICK
Oh.. Let me think. Almost thirty
years now.
SOPHIE
Wow. And you run the place by
yourself?
FREDRICK
Erm... Well yes.
Behind them both the workshop door creeks as it closes. The
pair spin to look.
FREDRICK
These old buildings... They have
a mind of their own.
(beat)
Was there anything else you
wanted to ask me?
SOPHIE
I'm sorry.
(embarrassed)
I'm prying. I'm not usually this
nosey.. Honest. It's just hard
being the new face around town,
you know?
FREDRICK
Well actually I don't.
SOPHIE
Of course..
(beat)
Well. Please feel welcome to come
over at anytime.
FREDRICK
I'll keep that in mind.
Sophie heads for the door.
SOPHIE
Nice to meet you Mr. Baker.
FREDRICK
Fredrick's fine. Really.
SOPHIE
(nodding)
Fredrick.
(pointing to her shop)
Any time remember.
FREDRICK
(nodding)
Anytime.
Sophie turns, opens the door, the bell rings and she
leaves.
The second she's gone Fredrick turns to the workshop door
and heads right for it.
INT. BASEMENT WORKSHOP
P.O.V of someone in the basement looking up through the
small window onto the street. They watch as Sophie makes
her way across to her own shop and then disappears inside.
INT. BASEMENT WORKSHOP
Fredrick rushes downstairs and into the workshop.
Fredrick stops, talks to someone O.C.
FREDRICK
Just what has gotten into you
Edward? Sneaking out at night?
Taking risks when people are in
the shop. This is very unlike
you.
We see what Fredrick sees.
The same workshop as before but now someone sits at the
workbench. A huge hulking figure. We see the figure from
behind as Fredrick talks.
FREDRICK
(softer)
Look Edward.. We know what
happens when you go out. When
people see you... You stay down
here for your own protection. I
made a promise to your mother and
when you go wondering off at
night you're forcing me to break
that promise.
(long beat)
Edward? Promise me you wont go
out again? At least until winter.
It gets dark earlier. The nights
are longer.
Fredrick waits, expects an a reply.
FREDRICK
Edward?
The hulking figure, Edward, slowly turn to face Fredrick.
WE SEE HIM.
Edward is badly deformed. His face a jagged mess of
abnormal bone structure. About 25 years old with pale white
skin and diamond blue eyes.
EDWARD
OK.
FREDRICK
Thank you.
(beat)
I see you finished the DELVINCHI.
He nods.
EDWARD
The Matheson's Dortchestor will
be ready later today.
FREDRICK
Oh good.
Edward turns back to the workbench. Fredrick walks over.
Looks over his shoulder.
Edward is repairing an impossibly old cuckoo clock. Despite
his huge frame Edwards hands are incredibly delicate with
the fine workings of the machine.
He works cogs and springs. Piecing them together and
constructing a working clock mechanism.
FREDRICK
Your talent never ceases to amaze
me Edward. You work ten times
faster then I ever could.
Edward takes a final piece, fixes it into place and then
mounts the mechanism onto the main body if the clock.
He takes a key from a chain around his neck and winds the
clock spring.
The clock springs into life.
Fredrick beams with joy, runs his hands over the clock
face.
FREDRICK
Amazing.
(beat)
Where do you go at night?
Edward clears the workbench. Takes little pieces of scrap
metal, a broken cog, a spring. He collects them all up and
puts them in a small wooden box.
EDWARD
Nowhere.. I just walk.
Fredrick looks at his watch end then up to one of the many
clocks on the wall, adjusts the time.
FREDRICK
Well I have to get back to the
shop.
Edward nods.
FREDRICK
I'm sorry it has to be like this
Edward.
EDWARD
It's not your fault.
INT. SOPHIE'S PLACE
SHARON 20's feisty pours a cup of coffee and carries it
over to a customer.
SHARON
There you go. One black with
sugar.
She turns and heads back to the counter where Sophie sits
and goes through some paperwork.
Sharon reaches behind the counter and pulls out a Figurine.
SHARON
How many is this?
SOPHIE
Three.
Sharon holds it up to the light, inspects it.
SHARON
Three?
(beat)
I think they're creepy.
SOPHIE
I kinda' like em.
SHARON
You're crazy.
SOPHIE
(jokingly)
Maybe I am.
Sophie stands and goes behind the counter. She reaches up
to a shelf and removes a few ceramic ornaments.
She reaches under the counter and takes two of the
figurines. Places them on the shelf.
SHARON
You're kidding right?
SOPHIE
Pass it here.
She reaches out. Sharon passes her the figurine. She places
it on the shelf next to the first two.
SHARON
So who's leaving them?
SOPHIE
I have no idea.
SHARON
A secret admirer?
SOPHIE
I said I don't know.
SHARON
(whispering)
Maybe it's someone in here.
She looks around the shop. About five people sit and drink
coffee, read papers.
Sophie looks around.
SOPHIE
Could be.