A scene with a clown.

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A scene with a clown.

Post by Duncanature » Tue Jun 12, 2007 11:00 am

Here's a scene from a script I wrote. I took it out of the final script, but I decided to post it here. It won't really make much sense out of context, but I hope you find it enjoyable anyway. Give me some feedback.


EXT. OUTDOOR BIRTHDAY PARTY - DAY

A BIRTHDAY PARTY is going on in the backyard of someone’s house. A GROUP OF CHILDREN are being entertained by a CLOWN.

Michael walks by and sees the party going on.

He walks into the back yard, looks at the clown and the kids and grabs a piece of cake off a table where no one is sitting.

The clown sees Michael and stops his act.

CLOWN
Hey, what’re you doing?

Michael looks up at the clown with a mouthful of cake.

MICHAEL
Having some cake, man.

CLOWN
Are you a friend of the family?

MICHAEL
Maybe, maybe not.

CLOWN
I think you need to leave, pal.

MICHAEL
Oh, you do? Well, what’re you gonna
do about it, Chuckles?

Michael begins to approach the clown.

CLOWN
We don’t need any trouble here.

MICHAEL
Trouble? You’re the one that’s
causing trouble. I was just
standing over there, having a piece
of cake, minding my own business,
when you started hassling me, like I
was doing something wrong or
something.

CLOWN
Look, buddy–

MICHAEL
SO! Are you gonna leave me alone so
I can finish my cake... or is there
gonna be... trouble?

CLOWN
Finish the cake, kid. Just leave,
will ya?

MICHAEL
I will leave when I finish my
FUCKING CAKE!

Some of the kids begin to cry.

A MIDDLE-AGED WOMAN comes out of the house.

MIDDLE-AGED WOMAN
What’s going on out here?
(to Michael)
Who the hell are you?

MICHAEL
I’m nobody, ma’am.

MIDDLE-AGED WOMAN
Get out of my yard right now! This
is my daughter’s birthday party!

MICHAEL
Oh, this is your daughter’s party?
Is your daughter such a greedy petal
that she can’t let me have a piece
of her fucking cake? Is that how
you raise your kid, lady?

MIDDLE-AGED WOMAN
Get out of my yard before I call the
police!

MICHAEL
Jesus fucking Christ! What I go
through for a piece of cake.
(beat)
I could kill all of you. I’ve got a
gun, you know.

MIDDLE-AGED WOMAN
I’m calling the police!

The woman goes back into the house.

Michael throws the rest of his cake at the clown’s face and takes off running out of the yard, grabbing a balloon as he goes.

Michael takes off down the street. The clown runs out into the street, too, but doesn’t follow.

CLOWN
YOU FUCKING PUNK!

MICHAEL
EAT s*** AND DIE, YOU RED-NOSED
MOTHERFUCKER!

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RE: A scene with a clown.

Post by Gyro » Tue Jun 12, 2007 7:16 pm

HAHAHA! Oh man, that was awesome...
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RE: A scene with a clown.

Post by Zacatac927 » Tue Jun 12, 2007 9:24 pm

hmm... ahem.... Wow... ha
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Post by Vor » Wed Jun 13, 2007 4:16 am

i like it :)

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Post by Duncanature » Wed Jun 13, 2007 8:22 pm

Thanks, guys.
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Post by Mr.Anderson » Sat Jun 16, 2007 3:25 pm

Is this supposed to be a more serious film, or is it just really, really dark comedy?
"People can misinterpret almost anything so that it coincides with views they already hold. They take from art what they already believe."

-- Stanley Kubrick

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Post by TroubledCobraStudios » Sat Jun 16, 2007 6:15 pm

i think it would have been amusing if the clown had pulled out a gun...just saying
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Post by Duncanature » Mon Jun 18, 2007 8:16 am

Mr.Anderson wrote:Is this supposed to be a more serious film, or is it just really, really dark comedy?
It's a pitch black comedy.

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Post by Vor » Mon Jun 18, 2007 9:50 am

than vin diesel shall be in it.

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Post by Zac » Mon Jun 18, 2007 10:54 am

i dont get it. how was that remotely funny?
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Post by smokeythebear » Mon Jun 18, 2007 4:06 pm

I would like you to film that scene so I wouldnt have to picture it and chuckle
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Post by puje » Mon Jun 18, 2007 4:38 pm

Off topic, but what exactly does (beat) mean in a script?
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Post by kene555 » Mon Jun 18, 2007 4:58 pm

It means wait a second or "pause"

Right?
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Post by Gyro » Mon Jun 18, 2007 5:37 pm

Correct.
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Post by Zacatac927 » Mon Jun 18, 2007 7:41 pm

beat means a pause or a second, but in film it can mean anything timed... an emotional beat it not the same timing as an action beat... it all depends on the mood, you'll be able to tell when or what the beat it
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Post by Duncanature » Sat Jun 23, 2007 9:14 am

Vor wrote:than vin diesel shall be in it.
I'd rather rip my dick off with a rusty meat hook than have Vin Diesel in anything I'm involved with.

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