Exploitation (my first script)

[inf3ct]

This is part of a script I was working on about 5 months ago, but never finished. It was supposed to be an exploitation film, and I never really had a title so I'll just call it Exploitation for right now. I would appreciate the feedback. Thanks.


FADE IN:

INT. VAN - DAY

BRAD sits in his sweat soaked shirt looking out at the miles
of road guiding him through the desert. His tangled beard
and long hair don't help to cool him down. Spots of dried
mud cover his skin and clothes. His van is just as dirty
with cigarette butts and trash covering the floor.

On the side of the road a man waves for BRAD to stop his
van. BRAD slows his van down and stops next to the man. The
man opens the door and hops into the van. BRAD pulls back
onto the road and begins driving again.

[center]BRAD
What's your name?

HENRY
Name's HENRY.[/center]

HENRY is clean-shaven with short hair. He wears a sweat
soaked dress shirt with slacks.

[center]BRAD
Well HENRY, what the hell are you
doing out here walking through the
desert?

HENRY
My car broke down a few miles
back. I figured that I better just
start walking if I wanted to get
anywhere.

BRAD
And where were you trying to get
to?

HENRY
Vegas. I got some work up there.

BRAD
(smiling)
Vegas!? I'll be damned!

HENRY
Oh, your heading to Vegas too?

BRAD
f*** no.

HENRY
(confused)
Where are you heading then?

BRAD
(smiling)
We're heading to Arizona buddy.

HENRY
(confused)
What do you mean we?

BRAD
(smiling)
We got some work down there.

HENRY
Sorry, I don't think I can man.
Can you just let me out right
here?

BRAD
(smiling)
Sorry ain't gonna do anything for
you.[/center]

HENRY starts to slowly pull on the door handle to try and
get it open. BRAD turns his head away from the road to see
HENRY about to open the door. Before HENRY can fling the
door open BRAD draws a revolver from under the seat and puts
it to his head.

[center]BRAD
What the f*** do you think your
doing!?

HENRY
(scared)
Nothing. I wasn't doing
anything.[/center]


BRAD pulls back the hammer on the gun.

[center]BRAD
You weren't doing anything? I
might as well not be doing
anything with this gun then
too.[/center]

Tears begin to stream down HENRY'S face.

[center]HENRY
(crying)
Please don't kill me.

BRAD
(laughing)
I'm not gonna kill you HENRY.[/center]

BRAD slows the van down to a stop on the edge of the road.
He then lowers the gun from HENRY'S head and rests it on his
leg.

[center]BRAD
Go on.[/center]

HENRY wipes the tears from his face and looks at BRAD
confused.

[center]BRAD
Get out.[/center]

HENRY opens the door and gets out. Then he starts running in
the opposite direction that they were driving.

BRAD sits in the van watching HENRY in the rear view mirror.
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a cigarette and
some matches. He lights his cigarette and gets out of the
van. BRAD stands there watching HENRY run in the distance.
Then he raises his gun and aims it at HENRY. He waits a few
seconds and then pulls the trigger. HENRY falls almost
immediately. BRAD tosses the gun into the van while getting
in and drives away.

EXT. ROAD - DAY

HENRY's body lies in the road where he was shot down the
night before. A white sheet is covering his body. Around his
body police examine evidence and search for clues to who his
killer is.

A cop car pulls up and SHERIFF ROBERTS gets out and heads
over to the crime scene. SHERIFF ROBERTS is a tall and large
man. His eyes are blood red. He looks tired and sad, but
angry at the same time.

[center]OFFICER
You didn't have to come.

SHERIFF
I didn't have to come? He's my
f*** son!

OFFICER
I know. I just meant that it might
be hard on you with it being your
son and all.

SHERIFF
(walking past him)
Get the f*** out of my way.[/center]

SHERIFF ROBERTS looks at his son's body covered by the white
sheet. He then walks over to one of the other officers.

[center]SHERIFF
Find anything?

OFFICER 2
We found a couple of hairs on your
son's clothes. We're gonna run it
through the DNA lab tonight.

SHERIFF
Call me as soon as you get the
results. I don't care what god
damn time it is. Just call me when
you get them ok.

OFFICER 2
I will.[/center]

SHERIFF ROBERTS walks back to his car and drives away.

INT. SHERIFF'S HOUSE - NIGHT

SHERIFF ROBERTS sits on his couch staring at static on his
TV. He takes a drink of his beer and then puts it down on
the coffee table in front of him next to a line of cocaine.
After staring at the TV for awhile he leans over and does
the line of cocaine on the table. He sits back up and
continues to stare at the TV.

The phone starts to ring. SHERIFF ROBERTS gets up and walks
into the kitchen. He rubs his nose and then picks up the
phone.

[center]SHERIFF
(into phone)
Hello.

OFFICER 2 (O.S.)
(from phone)
We got those results in and found
a match. Those hairs we found
belong to a Mr. Drezner. Brad
Drezner.

SHERIFF
(into phone)
Ok. Do we have an address or
anything for this bastard?

OFFICER 2 (O.S.)
(from phone)
All we have is his mom's address
and we're not sure if he is living
there anymore or not.

SHERIFF
(into phone)
Gimme that address and everything
else you got on this f***
cocksucker.


INT. MOTEL OFFICE - NIGHT

BRAD walks into the cramped and dirty office of the Desert
Gardens motel. The MOTEL MANAGER does not notice BRAD walk
in and continues to watch TV behind the counter.

[center]BRAD
I need a room.[/center]

The MOTEL MANAGER looks up and sees BRAD standing at the
counter. He turns off the TV with the remote, gets up and
walks over to the counter.

[center]MOTEL MANAGER
Just you?

BRAD
Yea.

MOTEL MANAGER
Twenty bucks.[/center]

BRAD takes twenty dollars out of his wallet and hands it to
the MOTEL MANAGER.

The MOTEL MANAGER grabs a key off of a rack on the wall next
to the TV. He then sets it on the counter in front of BRAD.

[center]MOTEL MANAGER
Room six. Check out time is at
twelve.[/center]

BRAD takes the keys and leaves the office.

MOTEL PARKING LOT

As BRAD walks across the parking lot towards his room he
sees a young GIRL getting a bag out of a car. He walks over
to her.

[center]BRAD
You need some help?[/center]

The GIRL is startled by BRAD and turns around quickly.

[center]GIRL
You scared me.

BRAD
Sorry about that.

GIRL
(laughing)
It's ok. Well, thanks for asking,
but I think I got everything.[/center]

BRAD pulls a gun out of his pocket and puts it into the
GIRL'S stomach.

[center]BRAD
Get your bag and come with me.

GIRL
Please don't hurt me. Please.[/center]

BRAD grabs the back of her head with his free hand and pulls
her hair.

[center]BRAD
Shut the f*** up and follow me. If
you don't listen though, I will
blow a f*** whole through your
god damn head. Do you understand
me?

GIRL
(crying)
Yes.

BRAD
(smiling)
Good girl.

[MGH]

do u have trouble thinking of titles like i do?

[inf3ct]

Yea. lol

[MGH]

I find it easier to film it then think of a title. You film or just write.

[MGH]

by the way, good script. i'd say just to find a solid ending, maybe the cop coming seeing brad face to face.

[DEDFX]

no need for the double posts

[inf3ct]

Well, I have been just writing, because I never really had a video camera, but I just got one for christmas so hopefully I will be filming too.

Yea, I was planning on an ending like that also. I just found that my script seemed to similar to The Devil's Rejects so I stopped writing. I didn't want my story to copy anything else you know. Maybe I will pick it back up again though.

[MGH]

It's kind of easy to copy a movie as good as Devils Rejects, and yes I saw a strong similarity. Just try and find something to set them apart.

[inf3ct]

I might try and do that to continue with this story, but I might just start out fresh. Not sure.